Recently we revealed why you most likely suck in poker and lose money in it. Now it is time to reveal the top 25 reasons why poker sucks. Yeah we know how media loves to keep up the image that poker is cool and how playing it will keep you young and fresh (sounds a lot like the tobacco ads back in the 70s)

1) It is boring: yeah it is compared to lot of other things you could be doing.

2) It is stupid: Think about you are dealt cards and then you hope that no one gets better cards in the end.

3) You will lose money: Yeah 95% of the poker players lose money in the end.

4) It is waste of time: The time you used for playing poker could have been used for coming up for solutions for solving the poverty.

5) Chris Moneymaker. Yep he was lucky and he won the WSOP, it doesn’t mean that you will ever win it.

6) Phil Ivey. He is a great gambler, you ain’t.

7) Luck. Getting unlucky sucks. Poker involves lot of luck.  

8) It was cool. In 2005. Now it is not.

9) You will win money. The 5% of the people who win money form poker will end up wondering if they could have made more money from other sources.

10) Poker clothes. Yep they really are ugly.

11) Poker tattoos. LOL. Do I really have to explain this one.

12) Poker strategy. Learning how to play is extremely boring and learning the optimal strategy can be compared to watching the paint dry.

13) It is nerdy. Yeah, some of the old school poker players such as Doyle Brunson might be cool, however majority of the new poker players are complete nerds and are playing poker only because it is “mathematically interesting puzzle”

14) Fixed limit holdem. HAHAHAHA. Why the hell did anyone ever invent this game in which the worst hand is the best and the best player is the one playing the most word hands.

15) 7 Card stud. Cool back in 1960’s. So stop pushing it.

16) Poker Face by Lady Gaga. This ridiculous song that has nothing to do with poker is enough reason to loathe poker.

17) Poker media. Poker media loves to make the lucky winners into superheros and forget the players that made it possible for the lucky winners to win so much money from poker.

18) Poker banners. The banners such as the ones that you see on this site are ugly and no-one in their right mind would ever click them just to join a new poker site.

19) Poker forums. Filled with egoistic teenagers who have never seen a girl naked except on their beloved computer screen.

22) Poker bonuses. They really are not bonuses. You have to clear them and usually by the time that you have cleared them you have lost your deposit.

23) Pot limit omaha. The Scandinavians can keep this game. Did anyone ever win this poker game without the best hand.

24) Writing about poker. Writing lists like this feels completely phony and fake. Because everyone actually loves poker, right….?

25) Poker. Yeah how clever was it that I listed poker as the number 25 on this list. But there is a real reason for it: this game brings the worst out of people, makes you feel like complete shit and overall makes people miserable.